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Last Post 06/02/2008 5:03 PM by  brighton
Funny Adjuster Resignation Letter
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barryk
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05/22/2008 4:47 PM

    Hey I'm looking for anyone out there that can send me a copy of a funny adjuster resignation letter that I saw back in the early 90's.  I also saw this same resignation letter on a plaque hung on an adjusters wall a few years later.

    It's a pretty funny letter about our profession and the skills needed to be good at it.  It says we need to know the pricing of everything from a sewing pin to a nuclear control panel, must be honest , witty and a mind reader and have the ability to do 5 things at the same time.  At the end it goes on to say that the last man to have all the skills needed was nailed to a cross and for that reason he tendered his resignation....  

    Hopefully someone out there has a copy in the bottom of a drawer someplace.  I scoured the internet with no luck.  I think this is the right place..  Thanks... 

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    Tom Toll
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    05/22/2008 7:21 PM

    That probably is the one I wrote in 1965 while at Farm Bureau. Sadly the original got burned in a house fire. I think it was post here at CADO a number of years ago. That will require some research.

    Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.
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    StormSupport
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    05/22/2008 11:20 PM

    Interestingly, I was cleaning out my desk yesterday and ran across this one, it might not be the one you're looking for but here you go!

     

    Dear Sir:

    The following letter of resignation accurately sets out the minimum requirements of an average claims adjuster:

    It is with regret that I have to come to the conclusion that is is necessary for me to write this letter of resignation, but things being as they are, I feel that as a claims adjuster I am a failure and will never have the qualifications needed to fulfill this unenviable, thankless and melancholy job.

    To be an adjuster, one must 'be courteous, diplomatic, shrewd, persuasive, an expert jollier, of an equable temper, slow to anger, a Sherlock Holmes, up-to date, good looking (with honest eyes and a glad hand), a good memory, good cigars, acute business judgment, and the embodiment of virtue but with a good working knowledge of sin and evil in all its forms.   

    An adjuster must understand insurance, electricity, chemistry, mechanics, physics, bookkeeping, banking, merchandising, selling, shipping, contracting law, medicine, real estate, horse trading and human nature.

    He must be a mind-reader, a hypnotist, an athlete, and above all, an expert photographer. He must be acquainted with machinery of all types and materials of all kinds and he must know the current price of everything from a shoestring to a skyscraper. He must know all, see all, and tell nothing and be everywhere at the same time.

    He must satisfy the claims manager, the claims examiners, the home office claims department, the underwriting department, the general agent, the local agent, the solicitor, the insured, the claimant and the State Insurance Department.

    Having heard of only one man with the above qualifications and finding that He was crucified over 1,900 years ago and though we, in our daily personal life try to emulate him, I now feel that it is impossible for me to ever reach that state of perfection so, without further ado and for the benefit of all, I herewith relinquish all rights, claims and titles, past, present and future as a claims adjuster.

    Do the right thing, ALWAYS
    ~Meg~
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    sbeau4014
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    05/23/2008 10:18 AM
    Thats the one that i've seen around since I started in this business. Only thing that may have changed over the years is they have to understand computers these days, which were non existant when it first came out.
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    barryk
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    05/23/2008 1:43 PM

    Meg,

    Thanks for posting the letter , that's the one I was looking for!   It's an excellent testament to our profession....

    I'm glad your letter made it back into your desk after cleaning.   I have been a little too ruthless when cleaning out my desk before and I'm sure that's how I lost this thing in the first place.  Thanks again...  Barry   

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    Tom Toll
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    05/23/2008 2:59 PM

    The one I wrote while at Farm Bureau in 65 was a tad bit longer than this one, but this one hits it on the head. I will try to find mine. Some of my ol Farm Bureau buddies may still have a copy.

    Good work Meg. 

    Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.
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    barryk
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    05/23/2008 3:31 PM
    Tom,

    I thought you were joking about being the original author. I guess I did post this in the right place.....your letter is brilliant , in fact every adjuster I have shared this with gets a real kick out of it. If you ever track down your version from your FB buds, please post a copy ....
    Thanks..
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    stormcrow
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    05/23/2008 7:16 PM
    I remember that letter from the early 70's in Canada.
    I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather, not screaming in terror like his passengers.
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    host
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    05/23/2008 11:58 PM

    I did locate an old post that was made in 2003 that contained a version that is a little different from the one Meg posted above. Here is a link,

    http://www.catadjuster.org/forum2/t...hichpage=2

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    Tom Toll
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    05/24/2008 9:27 PM

    Barry, the original resignation letter was short and was written by a gentlemen with Southern Farm Bureau Casualty in Little Rock. No one would admit writing it, but we all felt the claims manager, Gerald Meachem, (now deceased) wrote it. He was the most brilliant claims person and attorney I have ever met and probably ever will meet. He was the man that hired me, believed in me, mentored me, and stood behind me and all his adjusters, contrary to most claims managers of today. He had integrity, honor, was knoble, and had character. I left FB in 1966, having had 5 years with them. I wrote my own version of the the resignation letter and submitted it. It got passed around a lot. I cannot take credit for the original.

    I am just about ready to submit it again. 48 years is enough.

    Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.
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    barryk
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    05/27/2008 9:59 AM

    Peter, Thanks for the link.. this is the version I remember...  I copied & pasted for anyone interested...:

    Standard Claims Adjuster Letter of Resignation

    To Whom It May Concern:

    It is with regret that I have come to the conclusion that it is necessary for me to write this letter of resignation; but things being as they are, I feel that as a claims adjuster I am a failure and will never have the qualifications needed to fulfill this unenviable, thankless, and melancholy job.

    To be an adjuster, one must be courteous, diplomatic, shrewd, persuasive, an expert jokester, even-tempered, slow to anger, a Sherlock Holmes, up-to-date, good looking (with a firm hand and honest eyes), in possession of a photographic memory, an English scholar, acute in business judgment and the embodiment of virtue – but with a good, working knowledge of sin and evil in all its forms.

    An adjuster must possess detailed understanding of all types of insurance policies (both currently available and planned for future release), as well as electricity and engineering, physics and plumbing, chemistry and contracting, mechanics and manufacturing, science and shipping, bookkeeping and banking, real estate and retailing, horse trading and human nature, state laws, county and municipal ordinances, and all insurance case law. Though not absolutely required, it is considered most helpful to have M.D., LL.D., Ph.D., J.D., and D.D. degrees.

    An adjuster must be a mind reader, a hypnotist and an athlete. He must be acquainted with machinery of all types and materials of all kinds; and he must know the exact current price of everything from a microprocessor to a supertanker, from a shoestring to a skyscraper. An adjuster must know all, see all, and tell nothing. It is extremely useful to have the ability to be several places (minimum of six) at the same time.

    It is essential for the adjuster to be able to arrive at a settlement which can perfectly and equally satisfy the claims manager, the claims examiner, the district manager, the home office claims department, the underwriting department, the legal department, the general agent, the local agent, the attorney general, the commissioner of insurance, the insured, the claimant, the occupant – as well as a wide variety of neighbors, friends, relatives, and casual acquaintances.

    Having heard of only one person with the above qualifications, and finding that He was crucified nearly 2000 years ago, I now feel that it is impossible for me to ever reach that state of perfection. Wherefore, without further ado, and for the benefit of all, I, being diminished both in mental and physical capacity, do herewith relinquish all rights, claims and titles, past, present, and future, as an insurance claims adjuster.


    Patrick W. Laws

     

     

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    barryk
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    05/27/2008 10:06 AM

    Tom,

    Hopefully you can hang on a few more years,  the industry needs individuals like you and your mentor......   

     

     

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    Dimechimes
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    06/02/2008 8:06 AM

    Here's some unusual (to be posted in a job ad) physical requirements of adjusters posted in a new Farmers claims job ad that need to be incorporated into a 2008 version of this resignation letter :

    Interesting comments found on this Farmers job ad found in the http://www.greatinsurancejobs.com career fair!

    http://careerfair.greatinsurancejob...nce/134777

    Physical Environment

    Required job duties are partially performed in a climate-controlled office environment, but with exposure to some or all of the following environments when handling claims in the field: Uncontrolled outside environmental conditions Excessive Noise Levels Chemicals Chemical/Biological Conditions Moving Mechanical Parts Areas considered to be dangerous Conditions which would affect the respiratory system or skin such as: fumes, odors, dust, mists, gases, oils, smoke, soot, or poor ventilation.

    Visit our Adjusters Information Blog
    www.dimechimes.wordpress.com www.Linkedin.com/in/dimechimesclaimSmentor www.Twitter.com/ClaimSmentor www.ClaimSmentor.com
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    brighton
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    06/02/2008 5:03 PM

    Remember when all it said after the basic description of the job was "And other duties as may be required."!!!

    Rocke Baker
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